1. Submit blindly, just to make sure you send out as many queries as you can.
2. Dictate to the publisher/editor what they should do.
3. Ignore submission guidelines, or just follow the ones you want and ignore the rest.
4. Tell the editor how to do his/her job.
5. Assume the editor doesn’t know what he/she is talking about.
6. Tell the editor you have checked with other sources who have confirmed that the editor is wrong.
7. Be a primma donna, e.g. demanding, bossy, untimely, and/or pouty.
8. Don’t make any effort whatsoever to help promote yourself.
9. Miss deadlines and expect that to be okay.
10. Assume your work is so good that typos and errors won’t matter, and that you won’t need to send a query first.
11. Ask the editor to review work other than what is being submitted.
12. Expect the editor to be your best friend and try to strike up a casual relationship.
13. Assume the editor has nothing better to do than work on your material.
14. If there is more than one possible person at the company you wish to submit to, then pick one person to submit to. DO NOT send out identical queries or submissions to all applicable people – and if you must, be sure to note your cc’s at the bottom of your letter.
15. Ask for advice on how to sell yourself or do your work.
16. Copy someone else’s work and call it your own.
And most importantly:
17. Assume you never make any of the above mistakes.
You should always remember these facts:
1. Most publishers/producers receive mass quantities of submitted work and/or queries. Usually, this is far more than they actually have time to get to. If they have assistants, the assistants may help with wading through the abundace of submissions. If they don’t have assistants, they get to the submissions as they can. One of the best explanations of just how many queries and submissions cross an editor’s desk was told to me by a fellow thespian working in Hollywood. She explained the volume of submissions that come in daily/weekly, and then told me about … “the closet.” Many companies have one … an actual closet, a corner of the room, or maybe even a storage room. All the submissions that the editor and assistants don’t have time to get to are tossed into “the closet.” When the end of the year rolls around, or when “the closet” gets too full, all of its contents are summarily sent to the trash. Your work could easily be a “closet” case … and you will never know if it is.
2. If I haven’t said it before (which I am sure I have) let me reiterate that publishers and producers are busy people. Don’t get impatient with them. You are not yet a Steinbeck or Hemmingway, so you are not in a position to be demanding.
3. If the shoe doesn’t fit, the publisher/producer won’t wear it.
4. Your query letter is your first, and quite possibly “only”, chance to gain the interest of the publisher/producer, so make sure you put your best foot forward.
5. Yes, it is highly likely that the publisher/producer/editor will remember you from previous contacts. So again, put your best foot forward. If you were demanding or impatient on a previous submission, they’ll remember it and will most likely not be willing to work with you again.
6. The editor has to consider many more things than just proper grammar and punctuation, such as marketing potential, interest (as in, is your work interesting), how much work will it take to polish your material for publication, suitability (is it the type of material they are looking for), and, of course, are you the type of person who will work with them, or will you be demanding and bossy.
7. You really do have a “one in a million” chance of being accepted – so make sure your work is interesting, well written, free of errors and typos, and is the type of material the publisher/producer is looking for. In other words, put your best foot forward and don’t try to wear someone else’s shoe while you are at it.
